So often we have self doubt, we doubt the things we believe that the Lord has told us, the words prophesied over us and the visions that God has laid out full in front of us. We doubt the Word in the Bible, we doubt our own heart. Why do we doubt if He is the one that told us. We doubt because we listen to the words of men, we think back on failures of our past and we watch the failures of others. We doubt because others have failed us, loved ones have hurt us, and we begin to associate the ability of God Almighty with the puny ability of mankind. But what caused those failures or things to not go as we expected? If God spoke...was He unclear as to what He was speaking....did He lie....or did man themselves get in the way or not sow what the Lord had told them to sow.
The first thing the Lord has spoken clearly to me is that He DOES speak to me, so the doubting does not come from him....if the Lord has given me a word, than it is so and I must stand on it. If I have discernment concerning a situation, I must trust the Spirit within me and believe that I can trust what He is revealing in me just as I trust that He saves me. It doesn't matter if others don't get it, if others disagree, if others criticize you for stepping out in what He has spoken to you. If He said it, it is so.
The second step in the self doubt or doubting of Jesus is "People have failed me in the past...how can I believe his word now?" I've believed that person before....they failed me...how can I trust them this time. We all have video tapes that we run over and over in our heads. They are videos of evil words spoken over us, inapropriate behavior, curses and blessings. The videos that had the deepest cut in our heart is the one that we tend to continue to run over and over. We won't release forgiveness on those that spoke evil over us, or those that had more than we did, therefore we resent them. We hang on, we play it in our head over and over. The Lord wants to set us free of those videos and give us a new video. A new vision of a future that hold promise and hope, a new vision of a future where He will redeem our past and restore our relationships. A vision of a future that we can take our pain and redeem it by speaking His truth into the future and change our path.
We've all failed, we've all had someone fail us.....but Jesus has promised us that He will never leave us nor forsake us, that he will take all things and make them good, and that He will restore what the cankor worm has stolen.
Years ago, I became a divorced Christian Woman. This was probably the hardest thing that I've ever walked through, it was probably also the best thing that ever happend to me. Is that to say that this was God's perfect will for my life? no......but He will take all things and make them good. But the doubt that this created in me was the most incredible painful doubt I've ever experienced. Doubt that I could ever love again, doubt that I could ever raise my children by myself, doubt that the love that God had placed with me would ever be poured out in another relationship. Doubt that the dreams and visions that He had given me would ever be more than just that...dreams and visions.
But the Lord spoke to me then, and has recently spoken to me that He will take care of the details, the nasayers, the roadbumps and the failures...my job is simply to believe that He speaks today, believe that He indeed has spoken a Word or a plan to me and then step out believing and not being tossed to and fro, but standing on the Word that He has given me and claiming it as truth.
I praise my father for the gentle way that assures us of our path and the love that he bestows upon us. He is an awesome God and I love being His daughter.
No comments:
Post a Comment